Having moved recently, we started attending a new church and decided to become members. Part of that process is submitting your testimony. The last time I wrote it was when I got baptized in 2011. So it was time for an update anyway! I’m happy to share it cause it shows how the Lord has worked in my life.

I grew up in a Christian home where I regularly attended church with my mom and sister. My earliest memories as a child are memorizing bible verses for AWANA – a weekly kids club our church had. Besides John 3:16, 1 John 4:19 was one of the first verses I ever memorized “we love Him because He first loved us.” It was also one of the first verses my dad memorized which ultimately led to him becoming saved when I was about 4 years old. We all went to church as a family ever since.

When I was about 10 years old, my mom asked me if I was a Christian. I knew the gospel and it had been presented to me many times at church, however I never “prayed the prayer.” I knew that we were sinners in need of a savior, that God sent His Son to die on the cross for our sins and if we put our trust in Him, by grace, through faith you can be saved (Rom 3:23, John 3:16, Eph 2:8-9.) Right then and there, my mom led me in prayer to be saved. I’m not really sure if I became saved in that moment, but it opened the door for more theological conversations with my parents in the future.

A year or two later, I remember being up late at night crying to my dad and asking him questions like “but why can I be saved when I’m not a good person? (Rom 3:22-26) Why did he choose me? (Rom 8:28-30) Why do bad things happen to good people?” (Rom 3:10; Rom 8:28; Lam 3:37-39.) All questions about God’s Will and Sovereignty. I wanted answers for all of my why questions – and when some of the answers to specific circumstances weren’t specifically in the Bible, but the answer was simply to have faith that the Lord is in control and He knows, it made me question more. I didn’t like that answer but instead of reading my Bible or praying, I let my pride get in the way and didn’t have any interest in those things. I didn’t have the faith to trust in Him in everything. Looking back at this I’m reminded of Rom 9:19-23.

When I was 14 years old, my paternal grandfather developed lung cancer. A few months into his diagnosis, he became saved! This was an amazing thing especially considering that whenever my dad would share the gospel with him, he would shrug it off. He seemed the least likely to be saved in our family. But the Lord did a great work. The chemo appeared to be working and I was very hopeful he would beat cancer. After all, he was now saved so it only made sense in my mind that he would live. A few months later, he wasn’t doing so well and was going downhill. When he passed away, I felt so hurt and betrayed by God. How could he allow this to happen? He was the glue that held together my dysfunctional extended family. How was this a part of the plan? All of those questions I had years ago came up again. It’s so sad to see a loved one deteriorate from such a nasty disease. The Lord is good and he softened my heart enough so that I could see His hand in it all. I began to see all the little blessings in such a difficult situation. One was seeing my dad who lost his father and one of his best friends, have such a godly attitude in the situation. Of course he was sad, but he had faith. He didn’t have answers to all the “whys” but he had faith that this was something the Lord allowed for a reason. Shortly after becoming saved, he made a comment to my dad saying “You know the Bible says that I am a child of God” (John 1:12-13.) A big blessing was that my grandfather was now in eternity with God. It was through this that I began to learn first hand about God’s Sovereignty and Will. Confronting my sin, seeing my need for a savior, how good He is despite how bad we are, how gracious and merciful God is towards us – I couldn’t help but get down on my knees and ask for forgiveness. Was this a moment of becoming saved or rededicating my faith? I’m not sure but I know that from that moment on I truly began walking with the Lord. I was baptized shortly after, on Easter Sunday in 2011.

Since becoming a Christian, I’ve learned that my life is primarily about learning to trust Him in all my circumstances. Sometimes I’m confused and don’t understand His plan, but when I look back I always see that He had me right where I was supposed to be. Some verses I take to heart are Ephesians 1:11-12, Proverbs 16:33 and Proverbs 3:5-7.

Thanks for reading it. I hope you found it encouraging.

Until next time ❤